Stress-Free Small Talk | Richard S. Gallagher LMFT

Small talk is a skill, just as learning how to bake a cake from a cookbook is a skill. There are clear phases to every conversation and teachable steps you can take to master each of these phases. If you learn and practice them, you will discover that you really can learn to be confident in any conversation.

The Oxford Dictionary defines small talk as “polite conversation about unimportant or uncontroversial matters, especially as engaged in on social occasions.” Put another way, its entire purpose is to build relationships. This is why conversations about “unimportant” topics can actually be some of the most important kinds of communication we have with people. As nationally known social networking expert Phil Gerbyshak put it, “Make friends first, and do business last.” It would not be an exaggeration to say the most important networking skill you can develop is to simply delight in the company of other people.

There is a popular saying that all business is personal, and it is true from the mailroom to the boardroom. People who like you are much more willing to help you, support you, and even promote or make deals with you. More often than not, these good relationships start with people showing an interest in others by engaging in small talk.

My Story | Steven Gerrard

There are some players that each and every football fan show respect. Steven Gerrard is one of these characters. I have recently read his biography: My Story. Previously I read Ronaldo’s and İbrahimovic’s biographies and compared to these stars’ biographies, I couldn’t find that much interesting stories. The way Steven tells his story is similar to the way he plays his football: well-disciplined and I think this made his book “standard”. Besides these negative comments, Steven has still things to share and we can benefit from his experiences. Below you will see my quotes from his biography: My Story, by Steven Gerrard.  

Steven Gerrard - legendary captain of Liverpool and England - tells the story of the highs and lows of a twenty-year career at the top of English and world football.

As the only player ever to have scored in a FA cup final, a league cup final, a UEFA cup final and a champion's league final, Steven Gerrard is an inspiration to fans and footballers alike. After joining his beloved Liverpool at the age of eight, he spent the next 28 years, and over 700 games, devoted to this one club. Perhaps the last player of his calibre that we will see display such extraordinary longevity and commitment, his loyalty ensures he will be remembered not only as one of the all-time Anfield greats but one of England's finest footballers.

In My Story Gerrard dissects his full playing career. He examines the defining games such as the 2005 Champion's League Final when he inspired 'The Miracle of Istanbul' as Liverpool came back from 3-0 down against AC Milan to become champions of Europe. He talks about his 114 caps for England, including World Cup and European Championship campaigns, asking what went right - and wrong.

In My Story Gerrard dissects his full playing career. He examines the defining games such as the 2005 Champion's League Final when he inspired 'The Miracle of Istanbul' as Liverpool came back from 3-0 down against AC Milan to become champions of Europe. He talks about his 114 caps for England, including World Cup and European Championship campaigns, asking what went right - and wrong.

Atomic Habits | James Clear

If you want to start a new habit, it means that you have a new challenge. If you need a supporter for this challenge, your main supporter might be a book. And if this might be a book, this will probably be this book: Atomic Habits, by James Clear.

In this blog post, you will find more than the average highlights that I share because this book is full of great insights. Here are just some of these awesome quotes which will make you take action.

Tiny Changes, Remarkable Results

No matter your goals, Atomic Habits offers a proven framework for improving—every day. James Clear, one of the world's leading experts on habit formation, reveals practical strategies that will teach you exactly how to form good habits, break bad ones, and master the tiny behaviors that lead to remarkable results.

If you're having trouble changing your habits, the problem isn't you. The problem is your system. Bad habits repeat themselves again and again not because you don't want to change, but because you have the wrong system for change. You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems. Here, you'll get a proven system that can take you to new heights.

No Way No Way, Do Not Say, No Way No Way (biography) | Şenes Erzik

I recently completed listening to Turkish Football Federation’s Honorary President, FIFA and UEFA Honorary Member Şenes Erzik's biography book "Don't Say No, No Way" on storytel. Cüneyt Kıran performed the reading of the biography which lasts for more than twelve hours. I learned Erzik's important anecdotes not only about his life but also about the world of football in his biography, which accompanied me while working and walking.

In his biography, Şenes Erzik sends a message that we must be rational for the rest of our lives without giving up. In other words, he tells his reader not to do what we can't do, but to measure it well.

I think it was his first turning point when he took the Robert College exams for high school education with the encouragement and support of his older brother Necati Erzik at the age of 14. The universal education he received in a respected school, the strong connections and network he built, was obviously a good investment for him.

The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle | Haruki Murakami

If you are a fan of Murakami, you should read this book as well. But I have a disclaimer, this book is really long. It took more than 1 month for me to complete the reading of this book. I read the digital version and when I see the original version in the book store, I said "wow, that is so long!". And out of this book, let's see what I highlight:

There was a small stand of trees nearby, and from it you could hear the mechanical cry of a bird that sounded as if it were winding a spring. We called it the wind-up bird.

Cats have their own way of living. They’re not stupid. If a cat stopped living where you happened to be, that meant it had decided to go somewhere else. If it got tired and hungry, it would come back.

Mindset - Updated Edition: Changing The Way You Think To Fulfil Your Potential | Carol S. Dweck

People may start with different temperaments and different aptitudes, but it is clear that experience, training, and personal effort take them the rest of the way.

It’s not always the people who start out the smartest who end up the smartest.

When you enter a mindset, you enter a new world. In one world—the world of fixed traits—success is about proving you’re smart or talented. Validating yourself. In the other—the world of changing qualities—it’s about stretching yourself to learn something new.

Benjamin Barber, an eminent political theorist, once said, “I don’t divide the world into the weak and the strong, or the successes and the failures. . . . I divide the world into the learners and nonlearners.”

People in a growth mindset don’t just seek challenge, they thrive on it. The bigger the challenge, the more they stretch. And nowhere can it be seen more clearly than in the world of sports. You can just watch people stretch and grow.

“Becoming is better than being.”

A World Without Email | Cal Newport

The book by Cal Newport,  "A World Without Email" is his attempt to tackle the crisis of focus and communication overload. To pull together—for the first time—everything we now know about how we ended up in a culture of constant communication, and the effects it’s having on both our productivity and our mental health, as well as to explore our most compelling visions for what alternative forms of work might look like.  

The key is to find ways to minimize context shifts and overload while still getting done what needs to get done.